So it’s Melanie’s birthday, for which I got her a toaster. That’s right, a toaster. But it wasn’t just any toaster. It was a General Electric 1950’s vintage 2 slice toaster, complete with the scrolling pattern engraved on each side. Anyone who knows their way around toasters would agree it’s a classic.
To celebrate, we had dinner with our kids, AJ, Stephanie and Megan. Dinner was great and as we cleaned up and put dessert out, someone asked “Isn’t there a birthday cake?” Now I know I saw a birthday cake sized box being loaded into the fridge a few hours earlier so naturally I said, with only the best of intentions, “I think I saw a cake sized box in the fridge.” It was an observation. For all I know it could have been full of edible Legos.
Megan, who is sitting on the side of the table to my right three seats down leans in, looks directly at me and says “THANKS, BOB!” Now understand, Megan is the proverbial “force to be reckoned with” so anyone in this situation has to deal with this impressive, totally sarcastic, fun moment at the same time as you think she wants to absolutely physically hurt you.
Much to my surprise, the cake was supposed to be a surprise and it appears I may have eluded to the fact that there might be one in the fridge. In any case, I embraced the totally justified, highly intense level of sarcasm delivered with complete conviction. But ever since that day, I can’t know there is a birthday cake in the fridge at a birthday party. I’ve become very uneasy with what to say if some asks if there is a birthday cake. I guess I could make a general announcement to all by asking “Is the cake in the fridge supposed to be a surprise?” This way we can all rest easy.