Here Comes Santa Clause

There are many people that believe there was an Adam and an Eve so why can’t we believe there is a Santa Clause? You can’t see them or have never met them so does that mean they don’t exist or ever existed?

When my kids were growing up we would always find on Christmas morning a note from Santa thanking them for the milk for him and the carrots for his reindeer. And every so often we would see footprints on the floor coming from the fireplace. That was enough for me. My kids are now 34 and 32 and I have never told them Santa doesn’t exist. And to this day my sister will swear she saw Santa and his reindeer flying off into the sky when we were kids. This was about the time she started experimenting with mind enhancement paraphernalia but that’s beside the point. She saw him.

There are about 7.8 billion people in the world and let’s say that 10% are children and there are 4 children per family. That would mean that Santa would have to make 195 million stops all over the world in one night. He would have a fraction of a second to park the sled, load up his bag, climb up the roof, slide down the chimney, put the gifts in place, drink his milk, climb back up the chimney, get in the sled and take off to the next house. It’s ridiculous, right? Of course it is. Santa has been doing these calculations every year and many years ago when the population was much smaller, he had about 15 minutes per stop. It was manageable.

But as the population grew, and the time he had per stop shrunk, he knew he had to come up with another plan. We’ve all heard of the list he has of all the children in the world that are naughty and those that are nice. By the way, he only stops at the homes where the children are nice.  He subbed out the delivery of coal to those that were naughty. It saved time and was cost effective.

Anyway, he has another list that we’ve never heard of.  And on that list are the parents of all the nice children. He contacted these parents and offered them the high honor of being Santa guardians. In this roll, each parent would take on the spirit of Santa and be responsible for getting the gifts for their own children. Santa’s logic was “Who knows best what children want than their parents.” And so all the parents agreed, they loved idea and were more than willing to participate. There were some issues initially about who should cover the cost of all the presents and the labor at the North Pole but it all worked out. Now, Santa can relax a bit, knowing that all of his children worldwide are being taken care of by those that love them the most.

Leave a Comment

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s